My nephew, Charlie Jack, turns two today. Pictures here show one of our first photos together (he wasn't even a week old there) and one of our most recent photos together (Thanksgiving '09). I love that boy as if he were my own. He is a happy, adorable, fun little man and he makes his aunt so very proud. I love cuddling with him and watching him smile.
Charlie, I want you to know that while you won't remember the past six months of your life, your aunt will. I haven't been able to see you as much as I'd like to, but it's only because I'm fighting my hardest to be healthy and rid my body of breast cancer. I'm doing it not only for me, but for you, your big brothers and your cousins. I may have had to sacrifice some time with you right now, but it's only because I am committed to having lots more time (years and years) with you later. We have lots of wonderful memories to make together, Charlie. I can't wait to watch you grow up! I love you more than you will ever know.
My sweet Marshall turns five today. Time just goes by too quickly for this aunt...I've been blessed to be a part of Marshall's life. I don't think I've gone more than six weeks at a time of not seeing him his whole life. I talk to him almost every day and he always asks me, "How doing?". I'm fine, Marshby, but I'm better when I'm with you. I love you to pieces, sweet boy. My love for you is stronger than you will ever know. I can't wait to watch you grow up and be the man I know you will become.
I've always believed certain people come into our lives at certain times and for certain reasons. Evidence of this to me is in my new friend, and hero, Tammie. When I went in for the mammogram that eventually helped diagnose me with bilateral breast cancer, Tammie was there. (She's actually the Supervisor, but was helping out that day doing the tests.) And Tammie has been with me every step of this journey. She's offered support, opinions, resources, you name it and Tammie is willing to help me get it. She was by my side before and after surgery and came with me to the meeting with the oncologist where we made the decision to proceed with the double mastectomy and reconstruction. Tammie's strength, humor and compassion have been constant sources of strength for me and I am eternally grateful that she is now in my life. Someday, I hope to "pay it forward" and pass along all that Tammie has taught me and continues to teach me everyday.
Tammie is a five year breast cancer survivor herself ... part of why I admire her and trust her so much. She's been where I am and is helping me get to where she is. Life is a journey ... look for the butterflies and dragonflies along the way. 
These two pictures are honoring a good friend of mine, Jill. She was diagnosed with breast cancer just six weeks after I was. Five weeks ago she underwent a double mastectomy and will soon be beginning chemo. Jill is so strong, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. We joke that we are "warriors" in this battle, but I have to tell you that her strength is part of what allows me to be a warrior with her. I encourage you to check out her blog (www.blogforacure.com ... she is listed as parkerfu). Check it out!
Six short years ago today, I stood in the delivery room in Billings, Montana and watched as my older sister, Caren, gave birth to sweet 
Callum James. Nana and I both exclaimed upon seeing his face, "It's Mitchell!" (Mitchell is Callum's older brother, whom Callum, as an infant and toddler, looked just like.)
Cal-bell, as we call him, is the sweetest little man, full of character, charm and a bit of mischievousness about him. Callum is protective, loving, cuddly, and smart. He is all boy and will always find something to get into (usually bringing along his side-kick little sister). He has been attached to the hip to his little sister, Brownyn, since the day she was born. When Bronwyn was an infant, and Callum himself ony 18 months old, he would climb into Bronwyn's crib and the two of them would sleep side by side every night. They still share a room, and most nights, the same bed. Callum is such a good big brother.
I'd be lost without my sweet six year old Cal-bell. My heart wouldn't be complete. This proud Aunt can't wait to see Callum continue to grow and shine. How I love that boy!
The year 1998 was not one of the brightest of my life. Divorce and the death of my beloved grandmother made that summer a test of my strength. Yet, that summer also brought me one of the greatest blessings in my life...my nephew Mitchell. He became the shining light for me that summer and has continued blessing my life with his sweet spirit. He loves to cuddle with his aunt and boy, does that make his aunt happy. Today, on your 11th birthday, I thank YOU for being one of the greatest gifts I have ever been given. I love you sweet boy.
Peace means different things to different people. I love this picture of Carson because to me it shows him "at peace". He's usually running around non-stop (often right into walls), but for a few brief moments that afternoon, he just plopped himself on the grass and watched his brothers and cousins play in the pool. One can only imagine what was running through his little mind right then...
But like I said, peace is defined differently by everyone. To me, on this day in August, it means being at peace with my decision to undergo a double mastectomy (with reconstruction) to help rid my body of bilateral breast cancer. It's been a long journey thus far and though I have a long road ahead of me, I feel peace right now. I feel I've made the right decision, have incredible support and encouragement from my family and friends, and know that by making this difficult choice, I will increase my odds of being around a long, long time from now ... hopefully long enough to see Carson's kids someday resting peacefully on the grass one summer afternoon.
My nephew, Charlie Jack, turns two today. Pictures here show one of our first photos together (he wasn't even a week old there) and one of our most recent photos together (Thanksgiving '09). I love that boy as if he were my own. He is a happy, adorable, fun little man and he makes his aunt so very proud. I love cuddling with him and watching him smile.
